Building Family Resilience in Troubled Times

Maintaining healthy human relationships takes time and attention, even under the best of circumstances. For most of us, relationships require work. We invest in them whether they are romantic attachments, friendships, or familial connections. But maintaining strong relationships in times of intense stress is far more challenging. Consider the stressful circumstances that most of us have lived through for the past year. While we have undoubtedly been focused on the COVID-19 pandemic, the resulting emotional fallout and other unexpected and unintended consequences are going to be part of the so-called “echo pandemic” for years and possibly decades to come.

Let’s consider some of the circumstances we as individuals and families have faced and the impact they might have had on our children:

Grief:
Since the pandemic started, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) estimates that approximately 550,000 people have lost their lives to the COVID-19 virus, making it the third leading cause of death in 2020 behind heart disease and cancer. This has undoubtedly had a tremendous impact of millions of people, including children who are likely losing loved ones for the first time in their lives at an alarming rate.

Loss:
Aside from the loss of life, children have lost rites of passage like starting a new school, attending dances and big games, being celebrated at graduation ceremonies, etc. Children may have lost something even more precious than landmark events, however. Many have lost their sense of security as their homes have been shaken by uncertainty and financial hardship. COVID-19 has hit children hard and the effects of the outbreak have been felt most intensely in minority households.

Isolation:
2020 was not a normal year for anybody. When the entire globe was engulfed in an unprecedented health crisis, countries went into lockdown and children began homeschooling. This resulted in a host of mental health issues, including anxiety over academic performance, difficulty focusing using long-distance technology, and missing out on the natural socialization that comes with in-person classes. Children have certainly sacrificed a lot. At the same time, they’ve had to face spending all day in sometimes very difficult home situations.

Abuse:
Children already living in tenuous circumstances have almost certainly fallen through the cracks when it comes to abuse, neglect, and household dysfunction – the three areas that make up the primary ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences). We know that rates of alcoholism and drug abuse have skyrocketed in American homes, and so has childhood depression. According to Johns Hopkins All Children’s Hospital, from April through November of 2020 there was a 35% increase in children who needed mental health assistance compared to 2019 and an uptick in suicide attempts as well.

The Headlines:
While COVID-19 and issues surrounding vaccination and mask-wearing are ongoing, we cannot forget that everyday social ills are still happening simultaneously. The recent anti-Asian hate crimes and the beginning of the trial of officers involved in the murder of Floyd George are raising anxiety levels in children, particularly among those of Asian dissent, minority religions, and black and brown children.

Seven Ways to Build Resilience

Is it any wonder our children are struggling? Even though our reserves may be depleted, and many family relationships are burdened by the cumulative effects of fatigue and added hardship, now is the time to work on building resilience – in or children and for our families.

Resilience is the ability to bounce back from stress, adversity, failure, challenges, or even trauma. While scientists believe that resilience may have a genetic component, it’s not generally a quality that a child either has or doesn’t have; it’s really more of a skill that a child develops as they grow. Like a muscle that needs to be exercised, children can be helped to practice their resilience skills.

Talk. Talk. Talk.
The old adage is true: Keep the lines of communication open to strengthen your relationships. You can use the technique of asking open ended questions in order to draw out your children’s true feelings on different subjects. This means asking questions that require more than a simple yes or no answer. You can ask your child how certain situations make them feel. You can ask them if they’re experiencing anxiety or trepidation about going back to school. Asking “why” questions tends to get to the root cause of issues rather than asking questions that simply require factual answers. Open communication develops trust. Children who believe they can speak to their parents openly and honestly feel as if they have someone to rely on, someone who won’t automatically judge them, and these positive adult influences help buffer the effects of stress.

Allow Children to Learn and Fail
As adults, particularly as parents, we sometimes try to jump in to prevent our children from failing. It is difficult to watch them struggle when we know we could help. But children need to take risks and push themselves outside their comfort zone to build resilience. Trying something new and succeeding at it gives a child a sense of achievement and the knowledge that they can do new things and do them well. However, trying and failing is equally valuable. Taking a risk with something new that does not work out teaches children that they can survive setbacks. Rather than helping our children avoid risks, we should encourage them to take safe risks and then talk through the meaning of success and failure.

Teach Problem-Solving; Don’t Give Answers
Adults often have the answers to small problems and issues, but we learned those solutions from years of living our lives. Children do not have the benefits of this wisdom. They are still learning. They don’t have the perspective of time and experience. Rather than providing your child with the answer to every question, it’s more beneficial to let them reason it out with you. You can ask skillful questions to lead them along the right path, but the lesson is better learned when they reach the conclusion on their own.

Help Identify Emotions
Children who are “acting out” are often behaving that way because they lack the language to describe the frustration they are feeling. They lack the ability to adequately express themselves. You can work with your child to identify the emotions they’re experiencing and help them reason out why they are experiencing them. For example, you might say to a child who cannot master a game and has started crying: “You feel frustrated because the game is hard and you can’t seem to get it right.” This is called reflection because you are simply mirroring back to your child what they are feeling and helping them identify and name the emotion. You can let them know that the emotion is normal and that it will pass. Labeling emotions and teaching children how to manage them is a large part of good parenting. You can learn more about childhood development, reflective listening, and limit setting in our manual for parents, teachers, and caregivers entitled: “A Way of Being with Children: A Trauma-Informed Approach to Resilience.”

Acknowledge Mistakes
It is not a weakness to acknowledge our mistakes. We all make them! The most honest and resilient people are happy to accept this fact. They share their failures openly and, more importantly, they share what they learned from them. You can share your mistakes with your children and let them know why you made the mistake and how you will do things differently next time. This is a key component of resilience. We will all face challenges in our lives and whether we succeed or fail, we should not miss the lessons that can be learned.

Coping Skills and Modeling Self-Care
Children learn through imitation. They look to the adults in their lives to learn how to respond and behave. So, it’s essential that we model positive behaviors that they can copy. As adults, we can demonstrate calming ourselves down when we are irritated or angry, practicing deep breathing, and focusing on positivity and a firm belief in a brighter future. You can learn some fun and useful breathing techniques for adults and children on our resources page. You can also model self-care, demonstrating to your children that it is OK to take time for yourself when we’re feeling overwhelmed. In fact, it is essential to practice kindness and self-love.

Bring Positives Into Your Life
There are activities that make all of us feel better. Scientific research shows the benefits of exercise and spending time in nature. Encourage your children to take part in outdoor activities. Play is one of the ways children express themselves and it is essential to healthy development. You can also encourage your children to develop an interest in crafts, art projects, music, drama, writing, and any other positive activity that allows them to express their individuality.

The more a child understands his or her uniqueness (and the more you can accept and appreciate them for who they really are), the more they will understand that they are equipped to face any adversity that may come their way…and that good times, positivity, and happiness lie ahead for them and their family.

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Fighting ACEs in Palm Beach County

Fighting ACEs in Schools

Toxic stress: “The physiological result of exposure to high doses of adversity without the buffering presence of at least one supportive adult” - can have devastating effects on a child’s life and on communities because toxic stress:

  • Interferes with healthy brain development and can lead children to experience learning difficulties, as well as to adopt maladaptive coping mechanisms such as becoming violent, overeating, or abusing alcohol or other drugs;
  • Alters the body’s endocrine and immune systems, increasing the risk for cancer, heart disease, arthritis, and various autoimmune diseases;

Alters how genes are read and transcribed, which can be passed from generation to generation.

Through this initiative, we are partnering with the School District of Palm Beach County to train principals, teachers, staff, and leadership on the impact of toxic stress and trauma. Over the past year, we have trained hundreds of professionals in the public school system.

Economic Impact of ACEs

Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) are "The Leading Public Health Issue of our Time." 

In the absence of healthy or buffering relationships, childhood trauma and adversity can have a devastating impact on the minds and bodies of children. Research confirms that children carry the effects of childhood experiences throughout their lives.

Childhood Adversity Research Facts: Over the last 20 years, research has transformed our understanding of how toxic stress resulting from childhood adversity is at the root of many chronic physical and mental health problems. It has a major impact on the economic and social health of communities. 

  • ACEs are surprisingly common (most of us have experienced at least one);
  • ACEs may lead to chronic diseases, depression and other mental illnesses, and violence;
  • Outcomes related to a high ACE score:
    • An ACE score of 4 increases the risk of alcoholism seven times and attempted suicide 12 times; it also doubles the risk of heart disease and cancer.
    • People with high ACE scores have higher rates of divorce, unwanted pregnancies, prescription drug abuse, broken bones, and obesity.

Without positive intervention, those with six or more ACEs have shorter lifespans by up to 20 years

Creating a Trauma-Informed Community

In 2013, the Palm Beach County Board of County Commissioners and a group of community organizations and leaders convened the Infant, Child, Youth and Young Adult Symposium (Youth Symposium) to share information and identify actions and programs to support the healthy growth, development and education of children and youth from prenatal to young adulthood. 

Birth to 22: United for Brighter Futures is the alliance of community partners that emerged from the Youth Symposium. For the past five years, this alliance has engaged other existing coalitions, networks and youth serving organizations, as well as connecting with families, community members, and, most importantly, with local youth directly. 

Click here to learn more about Birth to 22, the Youth Master Plan, and resources in Palm Beach County.

Childhood trauma isn’t something you just get over as you grow up.

Children who live in environments where there is ongoing exposure to violence, abuse, and neglect - in the absence of buffering relationships - are at-risk for an array of problems throughout the lifespan. Prevention and early intervention efforts are critical - and all the key players in community need to be involved.

Through the Fighting ACEs Initiative, Center for Child Counseling is working with leaders, stakeholders, and organizations throughout Palm Beach County to help create a trauma-informed community.

Due to the interest in continuing this important conversation, we created this blog to share information and get your feedback, questions, ideas, and resources.

PBC Leaders Fighting ACEs

What are ACEs?

aces

What’s Your ACE Score?

Take a few minutes to complete the ACE survey.
 
Your answers will be completely anonymous. Please know that this survey is for your own purposes. If you have questions or would like a free phone consultation, please call 561-244-9499.
 
What are ACEs?
 
ACEs - Adverse Childhood Experiences - harm children’s developing brains so profoundly that the effects show up decades later; they cause much of chronic disease, most mental illness, and are at the root of most violence. Source: ACEs Too High
 
Information about ACEs - Adverse Childhood Experiences - is based on the results from a large study in the mid 1990s which discovered a direct correlation between adverse experiences as a child and a decline in mental and physical well-being in adulthood. The study narrowed down ten ACEs and developed a survey to get a person’s ACE "score."
 
The ACE Study has published about 70 research papers since 1998 and hundreds of additional research papers based on the ACE Study have been published.
 
What is A Trauma-Informed Approach?
 
A trauma-informed approach asks: “What happened to you?” instead of “What’s wrong with you?” It is designed to avoid re-traumatizing already traumatized people, with a focus on “safety first” (including emotional safety), and a commitment to do no harm.
 

How Resilience is Built

Pandemic Trauma and Schooling: Supporting Kids in Crisis

We’ve been living in the world of the COVID-19 pandemic for over a year now. In the so-called “before times”, adults used the phrase “hitting the wall” as a way to describe a feeling of complete overload, a sense of being unable to continue normal functioning due to overwhelming circumstances. Recently, that phrase is being used to describe the experiences of children who have faced a daunting year of online learning, isolation, technology saturation, and general grief. Now, those same students are facing the new challenges of returning to traditional schooling, too.

Children who have “hit the wall” are struggling with school on every level and in different ways. Some are struggling with the loss of the normal socialization which being at school usually provides. Others are falling behind academically and are stressed as to whether they will ever be able to catch up. Still others are mourning the milestones they have lost that were once provided by the school setting — things like proms, big games, theater productions, class trips, and other school-based activities we all once took for granted.

Sobering Circumstances

To understand the complexity of the situation, let’s examine some of the ways the pandemic has hit families. According to an NBC report on the unexpected effects of the COVID-19 outbreak on children:

  • Emergency rooms have seen a 24 percent increase in mental health-related visits from children ages 5 to 11 compared to last year. The increase among older kids is even higher — 31 percent.
  • Food banks have been slammed with hungry families as an estimated 17 million children — many largely cut off from free school lunches — are now in danger of not having enough to eat. That’s an increase of more than 6 million hungry children compared to before the pandemic.
  • Schools are struggling to teach students remotely or in classrooms in which children wear masks and sit behind plastic shields. One national testing organization reported that the average student in grades 3-8 who took a math assessment this fall scored 5 to 10 percentile points behind students who took the same test last year, with Black, Hispanic and poor students falling even further behind.
  • Classrooms have been unusually empty, with quarantines and sickness affecting attendance in face-to-face schools and computer issues interfering with online instruction. Some districts report that the number of students who’ve missed at least 10 percent of classes, which studies show could lead to devastating lifelong consequences, has more than doubled.
  • And an estimated 3 million vulnerable students — who are homeless, in foster care, have disabilities or are learning English — appear to not be in school at all.

Children Have Been Hit Hard

At home, the signs that a child is struggling are as numerous as the reasons they might be struggling. Very young children may regress, wanting to sleep in bed with caregivers or wanting to be spoon-fed again after they’ve already mastered feeding themselves. Older children might seem clingy or more tearful than usual. These are all responses to the uncertainty and anxiety of the times we’re living in. For teens, rates of anxiety and depression are soaring. Paul Gionfriddo, the president and CEO of Mental Health America, an organization that supports people with mental illness, says approximately 10,000 people took its online depression and anxiety screening every day this year, twice as many as usual. The biggest rise is among children between the ages of 11 and 17. “We know that trauma builds on trauma,” Gionfriddo says. “Once people have experienced trauma, they are far more likely to have mental health effects later on, sometimes right away, sometimes decades later, and we know that repeated traumas can exacerbate and make that worse.”

And when it comes the trauma families and children have endured throughout 2020 (and continue to endure), a vaccine is not going to be a magical cure. “A nation of children coping with trauma and disruption will need more than a vaccine to address the fallout,” explains Betheny Gross, the associate director at the Center on Reinventing Public Education at the University of Washington. When it comes to the social, emotional, and academic ordeal so extreme that some advocates and experts warn its repercussions could rival those of a hurricane or other disaster. “Recovery from Katrina wasn’t a one-year recovery,” Gross explains. “We didn’t just bring the kids back and everything fell into place. And this will be the same.”

So, how can we support children as many of them continue remote lessons, and how can we help those who are transitioning back to the physical classroom setting?

The first important thing to note is that a wide range of emotions and responses should be considered normal in these abnormal circumstances. Some children may be showing signs of withdrawing, others may be acting out, some may be putting on a brave face so that they seem to be coping when they’re secretly filled with anxiety and stress. This last circumstance is most likely when parents or adults in the home are struggling. Some children’s response is to protect their parents when they see them under stress.

Back-to-School Woes

While some feel that things are “returning to normal” as far as school goes, nothing could be further from the truth. Schools that have reopened have done so under strict social distancing guidelines, with masks hiding faces and facial expressions and forming a barrier to communication. Again, nothing feels normal. As children return to classrooms, they come with as many challenges as you can imagine. Some have thrived with remote learning and are not excited to be back in the classroom. Some have struggled with remote learning and have fallen behind. They’re feeling anxiety as to whether they’ll be able to catch up. For those who are still taking part in remote learning, many have reached a place where they simply cannot focus or seem to achieve once easy tasks. The brain can only cope with so much technological stimulation in a given period of time. It is not possible to retain focus for eight hours a day on a glowing screen, no matter how engaging or enthusiastic a teacher may be. Many teachers have gone to heroic lengths to be innovative and exciting in their approach to online lessons but, after a year, these efforts are undoubtedly wearing thin on them, too.

Adversity Has Been Amplified

The children most affected by both home school and the return to school will be those facing racial, economic, and other inequities that have only become more pronounced since the pandemic began, David Hinojosa, the director of the Educational Opportunities Project at the Lawyers’ Committee for Civil Rights Under Law. “They already lagged behind their peers in school, and already faced significant obstacles. And now they’ve taken the brunt of the pandemic’s pain,” he said.

As far as academics go, many schools have implemented mentoring programs and extra lessons to help children who may be falling through the cracks to catch up. But it’s important to remember that Adverse Community Environments are part of many children’s lives. Challenged communities with fewer resources (those with deprivation where poverty and and violence are a part of every day life) have faced the worst of the pandemics fallout. For children living in these environments, going to school was something of a refuge from the turmoil at home. For the past year, these students have been fully immersed in the adversity of their homes and neighborhoods and have likely struggled the most to find quiet places where they could focus on remote learning. Expecting these children to return to school without significant support is expecting too much.

Returning to school may bring with it fear associated with health. For so long, we’ve been teaching children social distancing and handwashing and being in close proximity might trigger fears.

Some Answers

As always, the answer to all these complex situations comes from the adult — the parent, teacher, or caregiver.

Communicate: Discuss how your child is feeling and why they are feeling that way. Don’t ask questions that have easy “yes” and “no” answers. Ask open-ended questions. Rather than: “Do you feel okay about going back to school?” (to which the answer can be “yes” because “okay” is a vague question). Rather, ask them: “What feelings do you have about  going back to school?” If those feelings are complicated or mixed, discuss them. You can reassure your child while still being realistic. Let them know that whatever consequences the return to school brings, you will work through them as a family.

Mirror Positivity: During times of trouble, children are desperate for security. Positive role models can be the buffer against adversity and anxiety. The more you can educate yourself so that you feel secure in your knowledge and your position on pandemic issues, the more security you can offer your child. You can say things like: “As a family, we choose to take this disease very seriously and we follow all the recommendations for handwashing and mask wearing. We also think it’s very important for you to go back to school and be around other children again.” (If this is your position). Explain why you have made your decisions and how your child’s school is protecting students.

Extra Help: If your child needs extra help, emotionally or academically, get it for them. Our School-Based Mental Health Program operates in schools throughout Palm Beach County. The SNAP program is also available to children identified as struggling. These are offered free through the County school system.

Most of all, help build resilience in children by talking to them about adversity. History provides countless times when humanity has been in far worse place — World War II, the 1918 Spanish flu pandemic — but eventually we, as a society, overcame them. We have an arsenal of knowledge at our fingertips like science, vaccines, and the technology to educate people and spread accurate information very quickly. Focus on these positives and on a brighter future. Your children are looking to you, their parents and teachers, to model how they ought to be. So try to be the best model you can — giving your child the gift of security. Remember, you have years of valuable perspective which they don’t. This, too, shall pass. Good times do lie ahead. We may not know the exact nature of our future but we do know that large pieces of it will be very good indeed and we need to reassure our children of that.

 

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Moving from Global Trauma to Hope

Wednesday, January 20, 2021 was the start of a new era in American politics. Joseph Biden was inaugurated as the 46th president of the United States. It ushered in a dramatic change in terms of leadership, but also represented the end of a four-year period of turmoil in the lives of everyday people, marked by division, dissent, violence, hatred, self-serving policies, incivility, nepotism, and greed. President Biden acknowledged the extraordinary times in which we live during his inaugural address. He named six distinct crises that the US faces: the coronavirus pandemic, climate change, growing inequality, racism, America’s global standing, and the general attack on truth and democracy.

“Any one of these will be enough to challenge us in profound ways. But the fact is, we face them all at once,” Biden said. “We will be judged–you and I–by how we resolve these cascading crises of our era.”

The Cascading Crises

Biden’s words were sobering because they put a lot of what challenges us onto one overwhelming list. By acknowledging the intimidating set of circumstances in which we find ourselves, we can clearly see what we’re up against as individuals and as communities. However, most of these issues have been with us for quite some time. While the global pandemic first originated just a year ago (in January 2020), the other issues stretch back for decades, even generations. It is hard to say which of the stated problems is the most pressing. It seems we must tackle them all simultaneously, probably in small increments, if we are to see progress. And while we might rely hopefully for solutions from our new government, the truth is that addressing every one of these six “cascading crises of our era” is going to begin at home, in the attitudes and lives of normal, run-of-the-mill people.

Existing Strain Exacerbated by a Pandemic

Is it any wonder, looking at that list of crises, that many of us feel despondent, hopeless, and riddled with anxiety? The world seems daunting right now and fraught with uncertainty. As humans, we may feel as if we have little power to affect change; we may even feel as if our reserves of strength are diminished or completely depleted after such a long struggle, especially during an unprecedented pandemic. There is no doubt that our children are suffering profound and unknowable anxieties and fears, too. Research tells us that the levels of trauma among ordinary people are at an all-time high.

The pandemic alone has left millions without jobs, sent billions into isolation, and forced nearly everyone on earth to suddenly grapple with the discomforting fact that we are all physically vulnerable to an unseen viral enemy. “The scale of this outbreak as a traumatic event is almost beyond comprehension,” said Yuval Neria, the director of trauma and post-traumatic stress disorder at the New York State Psychiatric Institute and a professor of psychology at Columbia University Medical Center. Neria says that the current health crisis can’t be compared to the shock of the 9/11 terrorist attacks or even the sweeping desolation of World War II, as the anxiety caused by those events was geographically limited. In this case, he said, “there are no boundaries.” We are experiencing truly global trauma.

Global Trauma

The most important first step is to recognize that we are all traumatized. To a greater or lesser or degree, every single person on the planet has suffered change or loss over the past year. Millions have lost their jobs – an economic disaster for some communities that disproportionately affects women, children, and minorities. 400,000 Coronavirus deaths in the United States alone means that millions of people are suffering profound grief over the loss of a loved one. The recent overt rise in white supremacy movements has left countless citizens of color living in fear in a country that proclaims equality as a core value. So, while all the normal sadness and losses of life are still routinely taking place, they are taking place against a never-before-seen backdrop of darkness, sadness, death, and uncertainty.

Perhaps there is comfort to be found in the fact that we are experiencing this simultaneously. While each person’s journey is unique, and so it’s not accurate to broadly claim that we are “all in this together”, nobody has been left unscathed by the recent stresses of life. It’s not worthwhile to compare your suffering to that of others, or to assume that people who seem to be coping better than you actually are. Because, in fact, our whole world has been traumatized. How can we know this? The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) is the agency within the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services that leads public health efforts to advance the behavioral health of the nation. It provides three Es to ascertain the degree of trauma you’ve likely experienced based on your personal circumstances and natural coping abilities. By understanding how the three Es work together, you’ll better understand how we’ve been affected by the past few years and whether you will come out the other side of these challenges in a better place. The good news is that the power really does lie within you, as an individual, and you have some choice over where you end up, regardless of what happens.

The Three Es

Event: This is a situation or experience that happens to a person or in their environment. The original Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) study conducted over twenty years ago looked at ten specific events in the lives of children under 18 that might result in trauma. These included incidents of abuse (physical, emotional, sexual), neglect, and household dysfunction. Since then, the idea of what other ACEs should be on the list has expanded greatly to include many other potentially traumatic events like bullying, extreme medical interventions, natural disasters, etc. Usually these events need to result in sustained toxic stress that interferes with a child’s natural, healthy development for them to be considered traumatic – but everyone is unique and even a single profoundly distressing event can be enough to cause long-lasting trauma.

Experience: An individual’s experience of a particular event or circumstance helps to determine whether that event qualifies as traumatic. What one person considers traumatic might feel very different to another. According to SAMHA, “it is how the individual labels, assigns meaning to, and is disrupted physically and psychologically by the event determines whether that event is traumatic.” Age old wisdom tells us that we have a little control over what happens to us. What we can control, however, is how we choose to respond to what happens to us. This is a very empowering approach. Resilience (which may have a genetic component, but which is also clearly a muscle that can be exercised) may determine our degree of “bounce” — that is, how readily and quickly we are able to recover from and address adversity.

Effects: The combination of the events and our experience of those events can have a long-lasting effect on our lives. These effects may occur immediately or have a delayed onset. Their duration may be short or long term. Throughout our study of ACEs, we have learned that, in the absence of positive buffering influences, children raised with high levels of adversity can suffer neurological and physiological development delays which disadvantage them mentally and physically for their whole lives. But a counteracting, positive influence can serve as the antidote to all that toxicity and studies show that it can take as little as one buffer to right the course for a child.

When we understand what trauma is, how it affects children and their development, and how all of us are suffering a great, big dose of potential trauma right now, we can begin to employ empathy in our approach to others. Only then can we begin to “be the change we wish to see in the world”.

Take Back Your Personal Power

So, given that most of us are not politicians with the power to make sweeping legislative changes, what can we do? The answer is to take a moment and reassess. Call on the wisdom of perspective. Nothing lasts forever and all of us have power. We never feel that power as strongly as when we make the conscious decision to take it back. As individuals, we each have strength — perhaps not to overcome overwhelming global issues but certainly to address them ourselves in small ways that can change our immediate communities.

Get Trauma-Informed

The first crucial step is to get trauma-informed. By simply reading this blog means you’ve made a start to learn a little about ACEs and trauma. Being trauma-informed is broadly defined as embracing practices that promote a culture of safety, empowerment, and healing, and that encourage support and treatment of the whole person rather than treatment of individual symptoms or specific behaviors. Trauma-informed care initially shifted the focus from: “What’s wrong with you?” to: “What happened to you?” This attitude shift illustrates a move away from identifying behaviors in the moment which seem negative and digging deeper to get at the root causes of those behaviors and so start to work on healing them.

Armed with a knowledge of the three Es and an understanding of the importance of being trauma-informed, it’s time to review the concept of global trauma and distill it down to our own lives. In the coming months, our blog will look at practical ways you can become more trauma-informed in your workplace, the organizations to which we belong, and in your own home.

For our part, at Center for Child Counseling, we’re mission-driven to support children and families experiencing trauma – which means our client base now includes everyone! We’re providing extensive community resources in the form of online trainings that deliver crucial information and offer coping skills to parents and teachers. Our website offers help with techniques to reduce stress and assist children to deal with their fears over the pandemic. We can also tailor-make trainings for your specific group or organization to address your questions and needs around ACEs or trauma.

We’re also fortunate to work in a larger community that’s committed to trauma-informed growth, too. In Palm Beach County, some major initiatives keep us focused on this goal. We partner with other stakeholder agencies on the Birth to 22 initiative where we serve on the Trauma Sensitive Community Committee which strives to build trauma-informed best practices and ACEs awareness.

How can you make a difference in your world? What will empower you to counteract the “cascading crises of our era”? Each of us needs to assess ourselves and where we are on the spectrum of mental health. We’ll be offering guidance and support for you and your children on this journey. We are all dealing with our own traumas but sometimes the solution lies within. If you need extra help, ask for it from those who care about you and reach out to mental health professionals for their assistance. If you have a day when you feel you have the inner reserves to give to others then reach out to them and offer your help and compassion. Bringing trauma into the light is one way of addressing it. As Dr. Martin Luther King (whose birthday was also celebrated this past week) famously said: “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that…Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

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By submitting this form, you are consenting to receive emails from: Center for Child Counseling, 8895 N. Military Trail, Palm Beach Gardens, FL, 33410. You can revoke your consent to receive emails at any time by using the SafeUnsubscribe® link, found at the bottom of every email.

Florida Blue Foundation Grants $360,000 to Promote a Better “Way of Being with Children”

Florida Blue Foundation has awarded Center for Child Counseling (CFCC) $360,762 to bring hope and healing to children and their families, and educate the community, by supporting the development and distribution of our unique curriculum called "A Way of Being with Children".

Mental health services are in demand more than ever before, particularly strategies to promote well-being and resilience. This is especially true in the case of children who have struggled under the COVID-19 pandemic, many of them experiencing fear, isolation, and the toxic stress that results from sustained periods of intense, unmitigated anxiety. Some children have tragically experienced profound abuse and neglect. Since its founding more than 20 years ago, Center for Child Counseling's mission has always focused on employing a trauma-informed method to help infants, children, and their families heal after trauma and go on to thrive. Over the past fifteen years, we have developed a unique, scientifically-based approach that is new way of working and simply 'being' with children.

Now, Florida Blue Foundation has awarded Center for Child Counseling a $360,762 grant over four years to support the development and implementation of the virtual component of our “A Way of Being with Children” curriculum. This will include community-wide training, awareness, program services, oversight, and evaluation.

The curriculum includes a 78-page printed guide and online training modules based in the latest brain science and knowledge of early childhood development. The training will include background information as well as practical hints and tips for building better, stronger relationships with children.

"We could not be more grateful to Florida Blue Foundation for their committed support," said CFCC's CEO Renée Layman. "It comes at a time when we are inundated with requests for services, particularly online assistance which allows parents, teachers, and caregivers the flexibility to learn at a time that is convenient for them. This vital information provides not only teachers with an opportunity to enhance their own understanding of childhood mental health but also informs the community at large in a way that is engaging, practical, and can make a real difference in the lives of our children."

The “A Way of Being with Children” curriculum is a transformative approach to childhood development and mental health that focuses on brain development, reflective listening, choices, limit setting, and building resilience -- all of which helps children self-regulate and feel empowered while still enjoying play and the natural joys of childhood.

About Florida Blue Foundation

Florida Blue Foundation enables healthy communities by making grants, building coalitions and rewarding best practices. More than three million people in Florida have received direct health services as a result of grants made to nonprofit organizations since our founding in 2001. Florida Blue Foundation is a trade name of the Blue Cross and Blue Shield of Florida Foundation, Inc., an Independent Licensee of the Blue Cross and Blue Shield Association.

For more information about the Foundation, please visit www.FloridaBlueFoundation.com. Florida Blue and the Florida Blue Foundation are on Facebook and Twitter.

About Center for Child Counseling

Founded in 1999, Center for Child Counseling supports children, families, and caregivers through prevention, early intervention, and services focused on mitigating the effects of Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) and toxic stress, building positive relationships that buffer the impact of trauma. Research shows that toxic stress in childhood is directly linked to negative physical and mental health outcomes. Thousands of children in Palm Beach County experience stressful life events that will impact them for a lifetime without intervention. In 2019, Center for Child Counseling served over 3,800 children through six clinical programs and provided training for over 3,500 professionals, students, and caregivers to build adult capacity to meet the social-emotional needs of children.

Social Media:

Twitter: @ChildCounselPBC
Facebook: @CenterforChildCounseling
YouTube: Center for Child Counseling
Instagram: childcounselpbc

CFCC is a Finalist in Best of Palm Beach County!

Center for Child Counseling is thrilled to announce that we have been been selected as a top-five finalist in the Palm Beach Post’s annual Best of Palm Beach County Awards 2021. This is a tremendous honor in recognition of the tireless work we do in support of infant and childhood mental health.

The Covid-19 pandemic has stretched many local communities to the breaking point and our services to help children and families heal from trauma and regain hope are needed now more than ever before.

We encourage our supporters to stand behind us with their vote. Voting is open online from 12/23 to 1/10 – and you can vote everyday! It just takes two clicks to demonstrate your advocacy and support for children’s mental health rights.

CLICK HERE TO VOTE FOR CENTER FOR CHILD COUNSELING

Our dedicated Board Member and Director of Legal Education, Eddie Stephens, is also nominated for his professionalism in Marital and Family Law as a partner at Ward Damon Law Firm. Stephens has served as a Board Member with the organization since 2017 and is crucial to our community education efforts In the legal field. You can show your support for his tireless efforts on behalf of children and families with a vote for him, too.

Becoming More Trauma-Informed During COVID-19

It’s that time of year when we all start to think about resolutions. How can we do better in 2021, as individuals and as a community? There is no doubt that 2020 has been one of the most challenging years in recent memory, driven primarily by the global COVID-19 pandemic. Consider some of the momentous implications of the global pandemic:

All these circumstances mean we are facing an unprecedented mental and behavioral health crisis. As always, it is often the children who bear the brunt of adults’ decisions; they are forced to face high-stress situations they had no part in creating. Even strong parents are feeling exhausted and burnt out both in their jobs and their personal lives. As we reflect on 2020, there’s no doubt we all feel the need to try and do better in the future. So, as we begin to think about how we would like our homes, communities, and work spaces to be in the year ahead, there is probably no more effective resolution than to decide to improve our interactions with other people, so that we can all acknowledge the traumatic life experiences we have undoubtedly lived through.

Resolving to work out more at the gym, lose weight, or focus on healthy eating are all great New Year goals, but why not decide to change your outlook in 2021 to focus on becoming a more trauma-informed and compassionate human being? You could also decide to bring this new attitude to your workplace whether it’s a physical location or a series of online interactions and meetings.

The way we choose to see and work with people can change our own lives. What does it mean to be trauma-informed? And what are the benefits of growing more trauma-informed organizations in our communities?

The National Healthcare Council for the Homeless describes a trauma-informed organization as one that has undergone  a “practice transformation which recognizes the trauma of clients, staff, and the community, and creates an organizational structure that avoids re-traumatization and encourages healing.” There are several simple ways you can move your life and your work towards a more trauma-informed place.

Education, Training, and Understanding

Organizations are comprised of people, individuals, and so building a more true-informed organization means helping people to understand how trauma affects human beings, their relationships, and even their capacity to cope with stress and other difficult circumstances. Science shows that childhood trauma can significantly impact the healthy brain development of infants and very young children. In extreme cases, ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences) can result in permanent cognitive impairment (especially if positive, buffering influences are absent).

It is important to understand that there is established science in the field of trauma and its effects, and we need to be informed on the subject. The National Child Traumatic Stress Network outlines some of these issues, including how children of trauma may have difficulty identifying, expressing, and managing emotions. They often display atypical stress reactions which can result in depression, anxiety, or anger. They can struggle to form successful relationships and may react in unusual ways to situations that others may cope with easily. All of these issues follow children into their adulthood. These children of trauma are our friends, neighbors, and colleagues. We interact with traumatized people every day and understanding them goes a long way to improving interactions and relationships with them.

To this end, Center for Child Counseling has developed a series of trainings for professionals and the community at large which delve into the science of trauma and help people understand it better. We encourage you and your organization’s staff to take advantage of these free and low-cost educational opportunities.

Attitude Adjustment

The primary factor in becoming more trauma-informed is one of attitude. This may sound deceptively simple, but it’s also the hardest aspect to master. Because attitude is developed over time, many of us retain views and opinions about others we learned as children. Often, these views are based on outdated and ignorant biases, racism, and skepticism. Our views of different groups may be stereotypical and mostly negative. It is only when we come to know or interact with someone from that group that we learn our beliefs are misconceptions, deeply untrue. A shift in attitude involves leaving these old attitudes behind. The same principle holds true when we interact with people who’ve experienced trauma in childhood or later on in life. They may react in ways that seem odd to us, overreact, or refuse to engage in productive conversations about issues. Rather than being exasperated by these responses, it helps to dig a little deeper and try to understand where the response is coming from.

We have no way of knowing what others have experienced in their past. So, we must use a trauma-informed response to their behavior. This involves adjusting our attitude from one of blaming to one of questioning, from assigning a negative response to assigning an open one that allows for communication. In the simplest sense, it means asking not what’s wrong with the other person but rather what might’ve happened to them that is causing them to react in a given way.

Becoming trauma-informed is not the result of making a single change or taking a single step. It is the result of cumulative changes within the individual and the organization. It also requires constant awareness, sensitivity, and an attitude shift among all individuals within an organization. For those providing direct care, professional training is most likely required in order to bring an organization to a more trauma-informed place. 

Support for Staff

You can choose to be the trauma-informed person in your extended family, your community, or your workplace. If you are in the position to provide leadership within your organization, you can choose to implement more trauma-informed policies and procedures. Even adopting a few principles for your workplace can create a better, more supportive environment for people managing the effects of trauma. This will undoubtedly help to improve relationships between colleagues and enhance productivity.

At Center for Child Counseling, we pride ourselves on being a trauma-informed organization and all our skilled therapists work from a place of compassion, understanding, acceptance, and genuine concern. While we always show our clients and their families the respect and care they are due, we also extend that same respect and care to our employees. Providing therapy and counseling to children and families affected by trauma has been our mission since the founding of the organization, but we also understand that this is not easy work and that it requires very special people to do it and do it well. Few jobs can be as emotionally demanding as that of mental and behavioral health professionals, so we safeguard the well-being of our staff in many ways, including encouraging self-care and providing weekly supervision meetings to support each member individually.

Recently, we received grants from BeWellPBC and Healthier Jupiter for our “Healing the Healers” initiative. This involves providing training, resources, and extra support to our staff so that they can, in turn, provide that extra care to our clients. It is our goal to expand this program to provide it to other organizations and we are seeking funding to do so. There has never been a more crucial or critical time to invest in support for caregivers.

So, as 2021 approaches, let’s commit to bringing more kindness, compassion, and care to our interactions with others. It’s only by expanding our capacity for love that we can counteract the pervasive negativity all around us. There is a saying, often attributed to Plato, that states: “Be kind to all you meet, for everyone is in the midst of a great struggle.” If we adopt the attitude that the human experience can be challenging and that we all need support at times, we can start to mend the divisions between us and grow happier children, stronger families, and more resilient communities.

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Center for Child Counseling Receives Healthier Jupiter Mini-Grant to “Heal the Healers”.

CFCC staff members (left to right) Audrey Schofield, Renée Layman, and Dominika Nolan display the Healthier Jupiter grant check.

We Focus on Supporting the Mental Health of Our Therapists as They Help Others

WEST PALM BEACH, FL – November 20, 2020:

Center for Child Counseling (CFCC) is pleased to announce that we have received a $2,500 mini grant from Healthier Jupiter to support their innovative and responsive “Healing the Healers” online learning series. These topical workshops have been specially designed to support frontline mental health therapists at the organization, which provides mental health services to children and families in Palm Beach County, particularly those who have experienced trauma. This is taxing working requiring intensive expertise and compassion and mental health professionals need support so that they can, in turn, effectively support their clients.

Workshop topics include Stress, Burnout, Compassion Fatigue, Secondary Trauma, Burnout and Trauma Among Black Healers, Symptoms of Burnout, The Biology of Burnout, Self-Care, and Self-Care Strategies.

The Healthier Jupiter grant will fund ongoing development of a series of online workshops using CFCC’s learning platform. The workshops are designed to encourage self-care, support mental health, and decrease burnout in helping professions. Piloted and designed in 2020 to support the 55 therapists at CFCC. With additional funding, the series will be available for other helping professionals in Jupiter, throughout Palm Beach County, and beyond.

Burnout is a long-term reaction to occupational stress which involves, particularly, helping professions. Burnout can be caused by secondary trauma, compassion fatigue, stress or moral injury. According to several studies, it appears that up to 67% of mental health workers may be experiencing high levels of burnout, with significant impact of COVID-19 to be determined. Leading researchers anticipate an ‘echo pandemic’ of mental health issues long after the physical pandemic has passed. We will see increased incidences of depression, anxiety, and suicide, escalating the demand for healers and helpers who are supported and mentally healthy themselves to serve a community in the aftermath of the pandemic.

To learn more about this grant, please contact dominika@centerforchildcounseling.org.

Background:

Healthier Jupiter’s Mini-Grant Program: For the fifth year in a row, Healthier Jupiter will offer $2,500 Mini-Grants to impact the health of our community. The goal of the Mini-Grant program is to fund projects that address healthy eating, active living and mental health in new, innovative and community-centered ways. These projects will create lasting and transformative change in the health, wellness and success of the greater Jupiter community. Not-for-profits, government agencies, civic organizations, public schools, school-based groups, houses of worship, businesses and individuals are encouraged to submit applications. Healthier Jupiter is part of the Palm Health Foundation’s Healthier Together Initiative, a long-term, community-driven approach to solving a community’s complex healthcare issues.

Founded in 1999, Center for Child Counseling supports children, families, and caregivers through direct services focused on preventing and healing the effects of Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) and toxic stress, building positive relationships that buffer the impact of trauma. Research shows that toxic stress in childhood is directly linked to negative physical and mental health outcomes. Thousands of children in Palm Beach County experience stressful life events that will impact them for a lifetime without intervention. In 2019, Center for Child Counseling served over 3,800 children through six clinical programs and provided training for over 3,500 professionals, students, and caregivers to build adult capacity to meet the social-emotional needs of children. www.centerforchildcounseling.org/

Social Media:
Twitter: @ChildCounselPBC
Facebook: @CenterforChildCounseling
YouTube: Center for Child Counseling
Instagram: childcounselpbc

Two CFCC Professionals Nominated for Prestigious Nonprofit Award

WEST PALM BEACH, FL – November 19, 2020:

Center for Child Counseling is proud to announce that two members of our leadership team have been nominated in the “Nonprofit Professional of the Year” category for 2020’s Hats Off Nonprofits Awards, the prestigious awards hosted annually by Nonprofits First. We are the only organization to have two team members nominated in this category, a credit to the caliber and dedication of our skilled staff.

Anne-Marie Brown, LCSW, MSW, MCAP, CIP, ICADC, has worked in the field of mental health for over 15 years. She is an EMDRIA Certified Therapist, a TF-CBT Certified Therapist, an EMDR Consultant in Training, a Registered Circle of Security Parenting Facilitator, and a Qualified Supervisor for addiction professional candidates. Anne-Marie has experience working with children, adults, and families who have experienced significant trauma, adolescents and adults struggling with substance use disorders, and individuals with co-occurring disorders. She currently focuses on providing individual, family, and group therapy for children and caregivers who have experienced sexual abuse, physical abuse, and neglect through our Childhood Trauma Response Program.

 

Dominika Nolan, MS, LMHC, RPT, NCC, CCMHC, is a licensed mental health counselor, registered play therapist, national certified counselor and certified clinical mental health counselor. She is the Director of Center for Child Counseling’s Institute for Clinical Training. Dominika is a member of EMDR International Association and she is a Registered Circle of Security Parenting facilitator. Dominika has training in Play Therapy, Sand Tray and Art Therapy techniques, Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy (REBT), Infant Mental Health, and Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). She has experience working with children, teenagers, and adults, providing individual, family, and group therapy.

 

Both women exemplify the commitment, compassion, and care that Center for Child Counseling brings to each and every interaction with Palm Beach County’s children and families and represent the organization’s values of integrity, professionalism, and excellence.

Center for Child Counseling is also nominated in the “Nonprofits of the Year (Large)” category. The organization was named “Nonprofit of the Year (Medium)” in 2018. Past winners from CFCC include our CEO, Renée Layman, for Executive of the Year and our Chief Program Officer, Lauren Scirrotto, won last year’s Professional of the Year award.

The Fourth Annual Hats Off Nonprofit Awards will be livestreamed on Tuesday, December 8, 2020 from 6 PM – 7 PM. For more information, please visit: https://www.nonprofitsfirst.org/page/HatsOffNominees

Background:

Founded in 1999, Center for Child Counseling supports children, families, and caregivers through direct services focused on preventing and healing the effects of Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) and toxic stress, building positive relationships that buffer the impact of trauma. Research shows that toxic stress in childhood is directly linked to negative physical and mental health outcomes. Thousands of children in Palm Beach County experience stressful life events that will impact them for a lifetime without intervention. In 2019, Center for Child Counseling served over 3,800 children through six clinical programs and provided training for over 3,500 professionals, students, and caregivers to build adult capacity to meet the social-emotional needs of children.

Social Media:

Twitter: @ChildCounselPBC
Facebook: @CenterforChildCounseling
YouTube: Center for Child Counseling
Instagram: childcounselpbc

Eddie Stephens Appointed Director of Legal Education for Center for Child Counseling

Center for Child Counseling, Inc. is proud to announce that Eddie Stephens has been appointed the organization’s Director of Legal Education. Stephens, who has served as a Board Member of Center for Child Counseling since 2017 is a Board Certified Marital & Family Lawyer and is a partner at the Ward Damon Law Firm. He is past chair of the Family Law Section Continuing Legal Education (CLE) Committee where he developed the Family Law Section’s most successful CLE webinar series which was produced for ten years.

Stephens brings those talents to the Center for Child Counseling where he has already created 17 hours of accredited CLE and his team has recently committed to producing an additional 30 hours of accredited content via his monthly CLE Series “Stephens’ Squibs – Monthly Family Law CLE” through July 2022 and has a goal to generate $100,000 per year in revenue for the Center for Child Counseling. “This is a neat opportunity to provide service to the professional in a way that has a significant impact on the most vulnerable families in Florida. It also frees us from any bureaucratic restrictions and gives us complete creative control. This allows us to do things that have never been done before by any other CLE provider, which is a lot of fun.”

Center for Child Counseling’s CEO, Renée Layman, sees great value in the partnership and Stephen’s unique and innovative offerings. “Part of our commitment to childhood and family mental health is to help build a more trauma-informed community. This legal education series is a huge part of ensuring members of our legal, judicial, and corrections sectors work with children and families in a way that ensures they are not re-traumatized. The financial contribution is wonderful for the organization but we’re equally delighted that our message of hope and healing based on the latest scientific understanding of childhood brain development reaches every corner of our community.”

In addition, Stephens’ law partner, Caryn A. Stevens, has been appointed Vice-Chair of Legal Education for the Center for Child Counseling, Inc. “Caryn is an incredible attorney, and was a mental health professional in another life,” said Stephens, “Having her as my right hand has been instrumental to creating this content.” After several years of editing Stephens’ written case law summaries, Stevens is thrilled to be able to contribute monthly content to assist other Family Law professionals in a fun and innovative way, while also having a hand in raising funds for such an important agency.

Neither Stephens, nor any of the attorneys who work on this project receive any compensation whatsoever.

For more information on Stephens’ Squibs – Monthly Family Law CLE visit www.EddieStephens.com/CLE

The series for existing subscribers will continue through July 15, at which time they will need to re-subscribe to continue with their 2nd year of education. New subscribers are welcome to register at any time.

Episode 4 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – November 15, 2020
Episode 5 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – December 15, 2020
Episode 6 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – January 15, 2021
Episode 7 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – February 15, 2021
Episode 8 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – March 15, 2021
Episode 9 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – April 15, 2021
Episode 10 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – May 15, 2021
Episode 11 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – June 15, 2021
Episode 12 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – July 15, 2021
[END OF SUBSCIPTION YEAR 1]

 

Episode 13 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – August 15, 2021
Episode 14 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – September 15, 2021
Episode 15 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – October 15, 2021
3rd Annual Family Law Mental Health Summit – November 1, 2021
Episode 16 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – November 15, 2021
Episode 17 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – December 15, 2021
Episode 18 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – January 15, 2022
Episode 19 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – February 15, 2022
Episode 20 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – March 15, 2022
Episode 21 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law – April 15, 2022
Episode 22 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – May 15, 2022
Episode 23 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – June 15, 2022
Episode 24 – Stephens’ Squibs Monthly Family Law CLE – July 15, 2022
[END OF SUBSCIPTION YEAR 2]

Background

Founded in 1999, Center for Child Counseling supports children, families, and caregivers through direct services focused on preventing and healing the effects of Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) and toxic stress, building positive relationships that buffer the impact of trauma. Research shows that toxic stress in childhood is directly linked to negative physical and mental health outcomes. Thousands of children in Palm Beach County experience stressful life events that will impact them for a lifetime without intervention. In 2019, Center for Child Counseling served over 3,800 children through six clinical programs and provided training for over 3,500 professionals, students, and caregivers to build adult capacity to meet the social-emotional needs of children.

Twitter: @ChildCounselPBC
Facebook: @CenterforChildCounseling
YouTube: Center for Child Counseling
Instagram: childcounselpbc

 

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